to be content or to not be content

These past couple days I've been wrestling with the inequailty of my life and that of the Hondurans. First because of what I saw while I was down there. Second because I have a good friend down there who's family is going through a lot of uncertainty with their future. And when I say wrestling... I mean really wrestling. It's tearing me up how life can be so unfair. It bothers me greatly that our yards are better hydrated than some people and our pets are better fed and nourished than some people.

It makes me feel unworthy of the life that I have here. Who am I that I get such a comfortable life simply because I was born here? I immediately think of the parable of the young, rich man in Matthew 19 when Jesus says, "Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." I didn't know this but... I am rich. Jesus obviously emphasizes that living in excess is not good. But then, how do you define living in excess? If I moved down to Honduras and embraced a life of having less, wouldn't I be one less person consuming more than I need in America? One less person taking something someone else could have?

Yesterday, I expressed all this and more to my roommate and she was able to offer me a different perspective. When I spoke of giving it all away and moving down to Honduras, she talked of Paul in Philippians 4:10-13 when he says he has had nothing and he has had plenty and he's been content in each situation. Just because we were born in America, does that mean we are less than the poor in Honduras? No. What astonishes me is the faith my Honduran friend has during this very difficult time. And when he hears me talk about this he says God put us each in our places, his life in Honduras, my life in America. Have faith in God that He is good. This to me illustrates the poor don't have daily bread, but they have God and eternal life through God. Lots of Americans have an abundance, but don't realize their need for God and the need to depend on Him. Who is worse off in this situation? Who's hearts should mine break for? Do I really believe that Jesus is the best thing that anyone could have?

read, read, read

I feel like that's all I've been doing. The only reason I've interacted with society these past few days is because I make myself get up and go do something else or because I have somewhere I have to be.

So what am I reading? Not books, or magazines or newspapers but blogs. Blogs from Americans living in Honduras. There are 2 in particular that update their blogs often and have been blogging for awhile and therefore have tons of information. When I first started contemplating going back to Honduras, I really thought I would be the only crazy American with such desires and would embark on this by myself. But I was so wrong, it was such a silly thought anyway. There's a complete network of Americans living in Honduras!

There is so much I've learned in these past few days and I've only grazed the tip of the iceberg! Here's some summaries on what I've picked up:

- Before moving to a new country, it's important to do plenty of research. As much as possible to fully prepare yourself for what to expect. Life is going to be completely different and you need to be ready.
- You really need to have a good grasp on the language, especially in a place like Honduras. There are people who will easily take advantage of a tourist or a foreigner who doesn't have a clue how to communicate.
- I'm going to need a lot of patience. Power outages and lack of water being top of the list of 'I need patience for...'
- I need to figure out how to be safe. Crime rates are higher than US. Not sure how to do this yet, still reading.
- It seems you need to be very independent and not rely on people much.
- Education is a big problem. Kids aren't going, teachers aren't teaching. For all kinds of reasons, especially in the public schools. This makes me sad considering how great our public school system and how incredible my teachers were. I would love to teach in Honduras so I can be a teacher who cares and encourages students to continue their education beyond the requirements.
- Oh, have I mentioned poverty yet? Yep, it's bad. One person mentions seeing children year to year who aren't growing. Malnurished children don't grow and their brains don't develop to their full potential. And several dont have access to clean drinking water. They should come to America and drink the water that comes out of our sprinklers, as we keep the grass in our yards better hydrated than people in other parts of the world.

There is so much for me to learn. Including Spanish... still working on that. :)

Chela

Who knows what "chela" means?

This is a new term to me. At first I thought it was funny, then I thought it offensive, and now I'm just indifferent. Down in Honduras, our translators and some of the boys at the orphanage called me chela. One little boy, Omar would follow me around, point at me and say "chela". I would say, "No, me llamo Chrissy, not chela". But he would just call me chela anyway.

So... ready? Chela means blonde hair/white girl. At first, I thought it was funny by simply the fact that they have a term for us beyond gringa. But then when the little boy would call me chela, I was a little offended because to me it was like him calling me "blondie" or something. I woudn't appreciate that if someone called me that here. Teasingly, I told one of our translators that I didn't like the little boy because he was calling me chela. But the translator, A-Bob, told me it wasn't a bad thing... more like a compliment. So now I don't really care because I don't really get the context of chela.

I watched Dirty Dancing Havana Nights after getting back from Honduras and the first thing I thought when I saw Romola Garai was "Wow, she is soooo chela". :P

Gra-th-ias

I thought I wanted to go to Spain to teach and learn Spanish but something quickly changed my mind. Well 2 things really...

1) I loved the culture in Honduras and felt very comfortable with it.
2) I downloaded some free podcasts for learning Spanish and was listening to it on the way to Bible study on Tuesday night. They got through the greetings and how are you's and got to saying Thank You. And this is what they said... grathias. I was like, what is that?? The man said this lesson would teach how to say words the way they speak in mainland Spain. I'm sorry but being from Houston, TX and hearing gra-see-as my whole life, I don't think I could ever get myself to say gra-thee-us. It's like nails on a chalkboard to me.

Therefore, I love Latin America and will stick to saying gracias.

Honduras trip

Can I just say in one word... amazing!!!

Run down of what all we did:
Friday - arrived in San Pedro Sula, waited in the VIP room while are luggage and passports were processed, went to our hotel
Saturday - in-country orientation in the morning, San Ramon private Catholic orphanage (~35 all boys) and had a Texas party with lots of fun games for the kids
Sunday - church at our Honduran leader's home church, our pastor preaches and Frances translated, Nueva Esperanza, government orphanage for a Texas party and taking care of the babies
Monday - Wednesday - VBS twice a day with San Ramon orphange
Wednesday afternoon - loaded all the boys and caregivers on our bus, stop at Burger King for lunch and spend the afternoon at the beach.
Wednesday evening - said goodbye to kids :(
Thursday - trip to Copan to see the Mayan ruins
Thursday evening - Farewell party and hanging out with our translators
Friday - leave to go back to Houston

It's hard to really put into words how great this trip was. I had no expectations going into the trip but it blew me away. I loved everything about it... the people, the culture, the language, the scenery, the weather, even the food! Well we did enjoy our breaks from Honduran food for McDonalds and Pizza Hut.

This was the first time for me to see poverty. Nothing compares to this in US. There is so much NEED in Honduras, it's hard for me to return to the US and live here. I never knew how rich I am here. I have an abundance and until you see people who live like the Hondurans, you don't realize it. I will never complain or wish I had more again.

I definitely will be returning to Honduras. I don't know when or for how long but one thing right now is really important... learning Spanish. I've already started but I realize this will be a slow process. However I am committed to it and will spend time everyday learning and soaking up as much as I can through several different avenues. My long-term goal is to be conversational by next summer.

Our picture site:
http://jvbchondurastripmarch09.shutterfly.com/

toooo busy

Life has been crazy and I've been so busy. It's been fun but hectic.

I leave for Honduras on Friday!!!!!! :) :)

I'm still debating about whether or not to bring my lap top and update my blog while I'm there like I did in Paris.